A Blog of Upsetness

My husband is exhausted, both physically and mentally, and so I type out of desperation to find some sort of peace of mind. Why is it that even ALL the way over in England, away from everyone, we still hear how people complain that we have "shut" them out of our lives? Brian's birthday should have been happy, yet we got a letter of reprimand on how no one understands what they did wrong that he would act so badly toward his family and friends. It's rather upsetting that while we struggle people complain because they don't get what they want from us, and when we say we are done with the complaining - it is denied that it ever happened. Brian is a grown man, and right now works constantly, while we struggle just to stay together the last thing he needs or wants is reprimand, particullarly for things no one has any right to reprimand him for. Exactly what is it that you want from us? Because the more people push the less Brian and I even want to come back to the states to visit, or at all. The more people feel they are entitled the less likely we are to have contact. The more you upset Brian who unlike me bottles all of his frustration, the less likely you are to have a relationship with him, and while Brian bottles his frustration towards everyone else it effects us as a family.

I wish that I could get on the blog and write about Zaylee taking herself to the potty 3 times last week and how excited we were for her, and this and that happened and bla bla, and be totally happy to share. But it's hard to share when my husband is frustrated at the whole situation. It's hard to share when the general feel is anger or dissapointment from the general population. And if you feel the need to defend your actions then you probably know that what I say is true, and if you have no friggin clue what I am talking about then you are probably in the group of people who 1. realize that it's hard to stay in touch with everyone and just randomly stopped by our blog today and thought...wow I didn't realize half of this craziness and as such aren't involved in the craziness or 2. don't think Brian or I OWE you anything and therefore haven't said to us or others who talk to us what a dissapointment we are so you just generally are like wow Brian and Meredith are writing cranky blogs. HAHA

In other news...Brian works alot and neither of us ever sleep and currently our life is beyond friggin stressful with finances being so hard, and we still don't have phone or internet but if you want to hear from us your best bet for Brian is to facebook him and your best bet from me is to e-mail me. I may update the blog now and then - but that entails me holding still for 15-30 minutes in from of a computer in a public place with a fully mobile one year old...were none of you parents? lol