My Christmas Wish List

I ache to be close to my husband again - but I've let myself go numb towards him. He misses me, and of course I miss him but I'm almost emotionless beyond that. A combination of spending more time apart then together, along with the "I'm sure you miss Brian" "Yes I do" "Well it's all in God's plans" or "It's God's will" it makes me wonder why they even say anything - it's like I'm being told that I shouldn't miss him. And yes I realize that they are trying to help, but it just doesn't seem to. Perhaps I'm scared that Brian and I will drift further apart until there just isn't anything left and I've gaurded myself to that, and it is probably further compounded by the "you get to be with him the next three years", add to that the fact that I must be a "strong wife" and I simply have shut down all emotion towards my husband. I need prayer that God will repair my marriage.

Then to make matters a bit tougher we found out that we may have to pay for my plane ticket to England, of course we will get reimbursed but still coming up with money up front for everything has become near impossible.

On the upside Zaylee Ann has gotten back to her normal self - talking again and everything - and she has discovered squealing and while it is a happy squeal it still kills my ears.

SO my Christmas Wish List
-Visas
-Plane Ticket
-To survive teething lol
-To repair my marriage
-And perhaps a pair of ear plugs - GOODNESS she is loud!